26 4 / 2011
So it’s time for summer clothes …
Must. Not. Diet. Seriously, looking in the mirror I’m not even sure how this … situation is possible. She defies the laws of physics, I’m telling you. *eyes closet warily* Ugh, at least my hair looks better.
04 3 / 2011
What in fresh hell ….
I’m not a violent person. Mostly. But this fuckery makes me want to hunt down Bitch Boy and beat his ass with a large piece of cheese.
First of all, he looks hot. And I hate him for making me say this because of what he’s carrying over his shoulder. A gym bag you say? Yes but what kind of bag? A pretentious-ass 695$ bag. What? Who? It can’t be! Yes it can.
Look, I understand a boy needs fancy stuff. Well, I really don’t but that’s beside the point. This is a gym bag. You use it to schlepp around your smelly clothes and God knows what else. So … why? WHY??? WHY spend THAT much money on it? It’s not even that awesome! And it makes you look limp. You can work out all you want, the pretentious-ass bag negates the manliness you’re working on so hard. Go stand in the corner, I can’t look at you right now.
Oh right, probably got that shit for free. My mistake. That makes it so much better. And I have no earthly idea who could’ve either given this to him or dragged him to the store. NO idea. …. Come to think of it, who knows if he’s even aware of the price tag on that thing. “Someone” may have just thrown it at him to make him the Mulberry poster boy to go with the Mulberry poster twig he dates.
I need a drink.
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